Southwest Leather Conference 2012

I’ve been sitting here this morning kind of in some zone, coming down from the incredible weekend. I can feel myself dropping, but it’s not a negative drop in any way. It’s sort of a processing kind of drop.

Master Onye’s words keep going through my head: “You are in exactly the right place at exactly the right time.” Oh, how amazingly true  those words were for me this weekend.

Thursday evening, we headed down to the hotel to register so that Friday when we arrived for the contest and hotel check-in, we wouldn’t have to wait in line to do it. That allowed us to have some quiet time in the bar with some people we really wanted to spend a little extra time with. Friday was spent mostly between contest activities and just enjoying seeing old friends and making a few new ones. The dungeon didn’t call to either of us on Friday night, so we again just spent lovely time with friends, old and new. Saturday morning found us up early to make a workshop that we ended up leaving, not because it wasn’t good, but because it wasn’t what we wanted at that moment. Most of the day was spent, again, with friends old and new.

Saturday afternoon, we had decided we wanted to attend Master Z’s 2pm workshop, Modern Primitive Practices in SM. We went thinking this would be a workshop where he would teach and we would watch and listen. It was actually an amazing ritual that changed not only the weekend for me, but my outlook moving forward in a specific aspect of life. Watching our volunteer sacrificial ‘goat’ accept a needle for each of us was truly transforming. Finding out later that he had never experienced needles before was mind-blowing. The energy in that room, the release and renewing that people experienced, the tears and smiles and laughter, were all just purely amazing. It was, as Master Onyxe stated, ‘exactly the right place at exactly the right time’ for both of us. And I will forever remember that exactly right moment in time.

Saturday night, the dungeon didn’t call to us, either. It’s funny to think about the fact that we had all this space and all this energy that could have carried into our play and neither of us felt the pull. We explored the vendors and had a wonderfully enjoyable time visiting Steelbones. Can’t wait for my corset to get ordered later this week and arrive here for me. Enjoyed playing for a moment on the electric stool in The Kink Shop and joking around with Samantha. Enjoyed the visit with Justin Sayne in Taboo Leather. And enjoyed seeing Sir’s face as he messed with the unfinished canes he won in the silent auction. We participated in the research activity that was going on, and I had a very enjoyable time being an interview subject for a very sweet young woman. I figured it would be a short 15-minute interview, but Sir assures me we were there on the sofa talking for over an hour. Who would have thought I’d talk that long in an interview about O/p and SM? We were actually in bed fairly early on Saturday night in preparation for the Dance of Souls.

This was our second time in the Dance. The opening was actually pretty amazing, and I found myself connecting with Master Onyxe’s words – “You are in exactly the right place at exactly the right time.” As we opened the circle for smudging, I found myself looking around at my tribe and smiling. I felt the energy and saw the beauty of the moment and of these people. I felt the beat of the drum deep inside, calling to me. I felt Sir’s arms around my neck, grounding me. I knew that Master Onyxe was right, I was in “exactly the right place at exactly the right time.

We had already talked to Master Archer and Elegant and were ready to be pierced. I wasn’t sure if my body would react the same way it did last year, and so Sir decided to be pierced first just in case. He was hooked this year in both the front and the back so that he could experience the pull from both directions. My hooking went fine and I didn’t experience the adrenaline slam that I had last year. There is something to be said for having experienced something once before to change the way you react to it. When we were done with the piercing, we both decided to walk around a bit and go outside for a few minutes to get ourselves back into the right headspace. Sir finished and was ready to get started a little before I was, and so I let him know I was okay and he went on his way while I sat a bit longer with my thoughts.

When I arrived inside the sacred space, I saw him in his zone, pulling with others and felt the call of the Portal. I sat underneath, leaning back against one of the pillars and closed my eyes. I felt the drum beat and began to move. I could feel the smile that was on my face and felt a little surprised by the joy and happiness that was coursing through me. There was no fear, there was no negativity in me in that moment. I just felt…complete and utter happiness. I stood, remaining under the portal for a little while longer, swaying with the beat of the drums, eyes mostly closed, just feeling this incredibly positive, happy energy moving through me. I couldn’t stop smiling.

After a bit, I went over to Sir. He pulled me to him and devoured me. I unhooked him from the back and we went our own way. I hooked his back to the chains of the Portal and then he hooked his front hook to my collar and we pulled. (I did not pull from my hooks. I still am not in the place where I can go there quite yet. Maybe next year.) Later, again with his back hooked and pulling from the Portal, he hooked to my rope. I pulled to the point that I could feel a slight tug against my hooks. It was amazing to be there with him in “exactly the right place at exactly the right time.” We danced, we held each other, we watched the people and felt the energy around us. About a half hour before the end, we knew our time was finished. We had done exactly what we needed, and received and gave exactly what we were supposed to.

While I was sitting under the Portal with a silly smile on my face feeling sheer joy, I realized that the reason for the happiness, the reason I was able to feel the happiness, was because of Master Z’s workshop the day before. I was able to let go of that which I needed to let go of. I had received the peace that I was seeking. And that allowed me to feel the sheer joy and happiness of my life and my path. For that, I thank both Master Z and our sacrificial goat. And before Master Z removed my hooks, I was able to tell him what his workshop had given to me and to us.

If someone had asked me 5 years ago if I would have been there in that “exactly right place at exactly the right time”, I probably would have been shocked at the question. Me? Getting hooked? Me? Taking in that energy? Sharing in that energy? For the second time? Not on your life. But Master Onyxe was exactly right – this weekend at SWLC, I was in “exactly the right place at exactly the right time.” And I thank everyone who participated in my journey this weekend.

©Beachgurl 2012

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